In Search Of A Diagnosis....
- Feb 26, 2021
- 2 min read
How would it be if we’d live our entire lives with no name. Names give us identity, it helps us develop our social skills in addressing one another.
A love of a mother is expressed through that whisper of a name to her child. I’ve been living with an undiagnosed chronic illness for 20long years, that’s eating away my muscles & nerves as one side of my muscles are 80% weaker than the other, which came as a surprise to my doctor, who said, I should just fall & be bedridden. I know the pain of an undiagnosed illness, that doesn’t meet with medical care. As the years progress it’s getting more tougher going from one day to another.
The Name of illness, opens the closed gates of hearts to reach out, to let others know that you exist & are seen & heard. Which to me is a transforming energy of healing & acknowledgment to all that one is undergoing. But most chronic invisible illness are lived in Complete silence, where no one knows the storms you’ve braved that has chiseled your soul.
My only therapy is love of Coco that is my only strength & SOS medication when I’m not able to walk, speak, breathe or use my hands. Most times I walk light headed in unfathomable pain like needles piercing through my scalp & being bedridden & home bound . Coco is a trained therapy dog & has helped me grow stronger each day, even through years of emotional abuse & both atul & I know, how he’s helped me in spirit to not loose Hope, especially as atul being the only earning member & travels often with his nature of job. It’s been mostly Coco & I, he’s seen me sinking, falling, like none
After 20years I’m #InSearchOfThatName & an healing that begins, only with a diagnosis.
This is my Shout Out to All who may read & listen to this, if you’ve come across any person with a pain like mine, whose found a diagnosis or some therapy then please DM & let me know!
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©️ Meghna/2021
http://www.meghnaloke.com/
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