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After 15 years of hibernation, I feel an urge to travel light!...By letting out all that, That I in my 'Silence' bottled up inside. Some thoughts, some sketches, pictures & drawings...woven as poetry; the way I look at life.

Heart Of God!

  • Writer: megloke76
    megloke76
  • Dec 18, 2025
  • 50 min read

Updated: Dec 25, 2025

Heart Of God-

For our Beloved Swami, From Our Beloved Swami!!!


30th November 2025


“Ask & it Shall be Given”,



That’s what Sai spoke from within my heart,

& today I’ve asked him to break his Silence regarding this excruciating pain, that came upon me almost 2 decades ago.

Which i have been bearing, with my hearts grace  & the love that both you & Coco (Coco, was our Labrador retriever baby- he was a therapy dog & helped many people in their pain, but mainly his presence was a blessing on me) showered upon me, along with meeting me with Kindness, So that my heart could keep going.

12.37am


No sooner had I prayed this- The very first picture to appear on my insta feed, is of Him sitting on Shesha Sai serpent.

In chits Swami promised me that Tomorrow early morning he shall answer my prayer.

He had kept this “Hope” going; that he shall answer my prayer regarding this illness for many many years.


So I felt, i shall paint this picture of Swami sitting on Shesha Sai,  & share it along with the name of this illness as a closure.

Until now, No medical science Nor any doctors, were of any Help to show me a way out of this deliberating pain, Let alone even diagnose it


Other than Coco’s love, Swamis grace & a strong support from my husband, there was No therapy that taught me how to live with this kind of a pain, That would often leave me bedridden, unable to walk for months, to be able to speak Or able to use my hands & breathe.




Once again Hope message from Baba, that this December he shall intervene.




By 10.41am i asked him, will it again be ‘Wait’,

Or will you answer in the morning & he picked the chit - tomorrow he shall Answer.

I finish the painting of Swami sitting on Shesha Sai, waiting to share it tomorrow after Swami answers my prayer.



By Night, This message where he’s saving, this girl, is so apt!

As we were in a mall, to buy a few needful things & I could sense that I’m going to black out once again in this pain. As I have blacked out far too many times earlier too.

Atul, my husband had to request that we get an early table by 7.30pm, for dinner as there was a long queue of waiting.

I gulped sugar water, that Atul asked for & ate a quick bite, Just so that I don’t pass out.

While waiting for a table, that took us 35-40 minutes to get.

All the while saving various messages from baba that would appear on my insta page

The Above message was one of them & Swami was showing even in that taxing moment- he’s holding my hand.


There have been countless messages over the years as “Divine synchronicity of Bhagwan”, to help me get through from one day to another in these last 24yrs of pain.

But this above message just summarised all those silent years in this physical pain, Where on many occasions it would cross all threshold, such that I felt- I may not make it this time.


1st December 2025


As I am a light sleeper due to this pain, I told swami in my heart- “if it’s meant to be then it shall be!”

In context to my prayer that ‘please reveal the name of this illness & where do i stand in this pain’, that has taken everything from my life.

1.17am



After few minutes by 1.23am


I see Shirdi baba in white Kafni- While I’m kneeling at his feet- He wraps a Golden Shela around my shoulders even as I’m holding onto his feet like my life.

I show the painting of Swami sitting upon Shesha Sai by handing over my iPad & upon seeing he tells me- “Chala, Chala Santosham!”,

Even as I’m wondering- that Shirdi baba never speaks in Telugu.


And he says- “You will get more than you’ve asked for”, with a lot of love in his eyes, like for some reason, he wants to lay this Universe at my feet”


Then he says - “Your life shall be A Beacon of Light for many to come!”,


“You Shall be Honoured & Revered!”


“You reside in my heart now & you’ve made me so happy!” & there’s a twinkle in his eyes, All the while as he says this.


“None can take away what I’m giving you My Child, you’ve made me so Happy!”


As he looks at me with those love-filled eyes,

He says “Everything has Changed Now!”


And i quietly sit there Cherishing this moment of an intimate H2h love flowing from him towards me!

I know this already transpired, in my heart-

i just know!!! He’s already given!!!

The whole Experience was more that a Vision-

for i felt it already happened: in the present!

Like the feeling is so tangible that I have no words to describe.


Everything has Changed now- Everything has Changed!!! I can feel it!!!


& later around 2.25 pm

I googled what does it mean when Shirdi baba wraps a golden shawl around someone & this is the answer that baba wished to give…


In general Indian philosophy and spiritual contexts, a shawl is given as a mark of respect and honor. The specific meaning of Shirdi Sai Baba putting a golden shawl around a person would be a personal and spiritual blessing, an indication of divine favor, and a sign that the person's devotion or service is acknowledged. 


Offering a shawl is a traditional Indian gesture of felicitating & When Baba offers it, it is a direct bestowal of that grace upon you.


Gold is a color associated with wealth, prosperity, and divinity. A golden shawl specifically would likely symbolize an abundance of divine blessings, spiritual wealth


The act of being draped in a shawl could also be seen as Baba taking you under his protection, shielding you from troubles, and guiding you on the path of self-realization.

I was so touched reading the above meaning,

As most of my life in this pain- i was looked down upon by many,

But here he’s comes showering

“His grace & Love!!!”

For which i felt so very Grateful!!!


Yesterday late evening around 7-7.15pm, i was sinking so bad in this pain, such that i felt I’ll pass out black out & not make it through this, as it was so intense, & today Baba was showering

His Grace upon me.

1.53am


later by 1.58am Baba sends this message-

again so apt

Click on the below link to listen to the message



& then in my heart-

i dropped all the baggage’s at his door- the burdens of pain i carried for long- Now they’re No longer mine- but His to carry; for now these burdens are His & His Alone!

2.00am




As this pain had been persisting since the month of October, on 25th November completely exhausted i told him in my heart- “Baba I’m yours & soley your Responsibility”


& then on 29th November he tells me from within-

“Beloved it’s no longer your body- your pain, you & i are one- so it’s my body- my pain!” While i was i was draining in energy due to severe nerve trigger points upon my scalp

9.12pm.


2nd December 2025

Such a beautiful message Baba sends to begin with…


pls click on the kink below to listen to the message



This is exactly how i saw him yesterday, Where he is standing over me, with his Protective love,

While i was kneeling - with his face very close to mine. & through this message once again he confirmed yesterday’s experience- Which to me was more than a vision.

& the message on it- “Hello December, Month of ending but beginning of transformation blessed by Sai baba”.


On 27th November 2025- in the afternoon around 1pm, While i was cooking- i heard his voice in my heart stating-

“you’re in my embrace my child, you’re Eternally seated upon my lap”, as a day ago i told him- “I’m Solely & Solely your Responsibility!” & to receive this above message is truly one of his wonderful signs of confirmation.




later around 9pm he’s assuring that- if you have me, then you already have all answers, all solutions in your life!




3rd December 2025


12.13pm

While sinking, draining in extreme nerve pain on my scalp, I told him-

“Baba, I can’t do it anymore….”

To that he says from within-

“I know, That’s Why I’ll Do It!”


Later in the afternoon


& then these below messages no matter what- Keep going, Keep walking.



pls click on the link below to see the message




pls click on the link below to listen to the message

Truly Gratitude in heart that he’s there, walking with us through it all.



4th December 2025


1st message upon waking up




Swami send this message through my mom. As she knows during such nerve trigger moments- I go through weeks & months without even able to speak, As these trigger points leave me utterly breathless.

But today’s day too, went in Wait & Swami didn’t reach out.



5th December 2025


This painting that I had completed & shared on 2nd of this month, Where I had asked you then- Swami when shall you answer with dates written on chits from 3rd to 5th.

& you answered that on the 5th that is today by morning, you shall reach out to me regarding the name of this pain- But you didn’t fulfil your promise maa…



(I had shared this painting of Swami on the 2nd, with a few poems, that he had given me through the last few weeks on my insta handle, as well as my website where i often share all these works of love)


My heart broke…Once again this Wait…

You Failed me!!! As you were to reach out today morning & one more day went by & you didn’t answer…

6.09am



I’ve often seen, Over the years Whensoever, Swami would break my heart this way, after promising a given date in chits & later Not Fulfilling the promise.

Baba would reach out to me in this way;

Where randomly he would make someone like

One of my earlier post, in which I’ve shared that i wish to live my life in Gratitude for Cocos love.

So as to reinforce Hope & As a reminder that don’t Give up!!!


Below are these earlier post that got liked today on my insta handle.




Since I had already started working on the painting in context to the below message Swami gave me on 3rd of this month-


while sinking draining I told him-

“Baba, I can’t do it anymore….”

To that he says from within-

“I know, That’s Why I’ll Do It!”

Swami, this painting I’ll only share if your words are Truth in Action. Cause today you were to reach out to me with name & current situation of this sickness, but you didn’t.


If you truly meant the above words- then let it be seen, Otherwise nothing!!!

They are just empty words…..


As like last year,  When you asked me to share- “I’m dying, in this pain”, which i was reluctant to share on my post at that time…

To that You very strongly said this to me from within my heart- “When Saibaba Tells you to do something, There’s Always A Bigger Picture!!!”


So Now Baba, it’s not just me taking first step- now you have to take the remaining steps to finish what you started back then, When this pain got so intense that it felt- I’ll die.

10.24am



To me, in this journey with Swami- Nothing is accidental as I was working on these 2 wheels for the cart, that were to be part of society bldg- Christmas decoration.


And while painting i was listening to this talk in which Swamis message was shared- that until & unless what you’ve prayed to God for- until it doesn’t get fulfilled  don’t give up on praying & asking… So Swami was stating- “Keep Praying for what you’ve asked!”


Screen shot while listening to the talk where it was shared, the below message

1.30pm




Since morning I was working on these 2 wheels & by 2.23pm, I offered these wheels at Babas Lotus feet & told him-

Baba these 2 wheels are my Shraddha-Saburi, and the between circle that holds the spikes is devotion. So I’m offering my Faith- Patience & Devotion at your lotus feet.


If in these last 24yrs, If at all,  i may have offered you even a tiny minuscule of this Faith & Patience at your lotus feet, from the purity of my heart then today itself you will reach out to me with the name as well as my current diagnosis of this pain.


Only if I’ve offered it from the truth of my heart-

If Not then pls don’t reach out- For this is  my test of devotion-not yours.

& I even added that these wheels are like wheels of my life stagnant since last 24yrs,

if Now is the time to move, then pls move them.

I even offered them as wheels of my marriage & offered all the problems that came into our lives with this pain.


After finishing the wheel work, later by evening i was working on some other painting-

When again from within, Swami tells me- “Finish the morning painting”.


So after finishing this work i tell him-

I’ll only share this after you answer my prayers regarding this pain. But something felt incomplete in this work and I felt Baba wasn’t happy…


& it’s just after i added the above energy sprinkles of yellow that are flowing as Grace from Swami towards me- safeguarding and carrying me afloat in this deep ocean of pain-

That from inside baba tells me-

“Chala Santosham Bangaroo!”

That now he’s very happy as the work is complete & with that he’s showing me that he has already saved me, as shown in the painting!!!

8.01pm


link where Swami is singing

It’s already 12am, the day has ended with your Silence & Once again proved-

“I’ve Failed that’s all!”

Failed in my offering of Faith, Patience & Devotion to thee.  As there’s No sign of Blessing you’ve sent my way.

I said, I’ll just carry on with this horrible pain, all by myself in Gratitude to Cocos Love!




6th December 2025


It was 12 midnight and Baba didn’t reach out…


While in unbearable pain, as I was massaging my head to relieve the nerve pain,

I realised there are countless trigger points on the left side of my scalp hence not only do my eyes get swollen but It leaves me drained out,  breathless & unable to speak & function for months on end.


Heart-broken, I lay lifeless in that pain, feeling “I’ve Failed”,  struggling with each breath,

cause my offering of the symbolic “2 wheels”, wasn’t Accepted by Swami, as he gave me No signs of blessings yesterday.


I imagined myself in Parthi- Sai Kulwant hall, laying curled up near Swamis feet as he sat on chair, while I was holding his feet as my home, with Coco sitting beside me. As I always felt  Very strongly, since his passing, Coco is with Swami now.


I simply let go, holding on to Swamis feet,

listening to this song that I kept on loop only to turn it off by 4 in the morning after which I caught some sleep. I felt the song voiced out my feelings towards Bhagwan.




Later Baba woke me up with a Dream.


The Dream:

I’m driving my jeep and after some distance, I take a sudden break as a litter of puppies come under my jeep. I get down feeling overwhelmed and pained that why such a thing  had to happen. I pull them all out- luckily all are saved except one, who has a scratch and is bleeding. I pet that puppy for a while, but then leave.


Again while I’m driving there’s a sudden right turn that my jeep takes and it’s jumped over a small landing across towards a completely different road. And I’m shocked and get down to check and there’s a small water canal, dividing me from the road I was meant to take.

And there was no way to turn the jeep back over that small landing.

So I’m looking out for help. And as I turn back, just within a few seconds- I see- the jeep is stolen.


And I’m wondering how can this even happen, when Im standing right here.

Later I walk towards the lane, Where my jeep accidentally landed and I’m asking people for their help to find my jeep.

One lady says there’s “a racket” going on here, Where people steal cars & she points me towards a direction to help me find my jeep.

I walk in the said direction and as I’m enquiring,

A girl passes by me and offers to help me find my jeep.


So I follow her and I see a few other people along with her, all walking towards a field. It’s dark and only the insect sounds are audible, so I tell them “please be careful, as there can be snakes…”


& out of the blue they pull out a huge snake, which for some reason is trying to stay hidden in the bush, but they still manage to pull it out & then I see that girl bent down, with her face close to the snake- whisper something to it.


The snake which was earlier trying to stay hidden is now making a way & leading us.

Seeing all this I’m just shocked, unable to make sense of what’s happening…

Yet I ask the girl- “Will the snake help?”,

& she replies “Yes”.

& As we are following the serpent- its hood is now wide open- like Shesha Sai and yet in that position it’s slithering ahead while we all follow it.


As we’re following the snake, I get the feeling “that maybe I hurt those puppies so I’m facing this in my life”, & I tell myself “I shall go and see if that puppy needs my help, I shouldn’t have left that way…”


After covering some distance, I see a big bird- an eagle on my left side-  trying to stop the snake, but it’s been shooed off by someone, Saying- “That The Snake is here to help & Only the snake can help”.

The snake slithers & leads us to another by lane and at the corner- I can see my stolen jeep.


And that’s when I hear Swamis Voice saying-

“You did Nothing wrong, you didn’t hurt the puppy” & listening to those words- I sigh a relief!


He further says, “I took it upon me, I won’t let it harm you, you did Nothing wrong! You stopped the car”.

And then he even goes to say-

“Since you’ve done Nothing wrong- I’ll do Right by you!”.

And the dream Ends!



So upon waking, I didn’t know what to make of it. What was Swami really trying to tell me & only after some research, Swami led me to the clarity & significance of the dream.





Symbolism Breakdown

Puppies often represent innocence, vulnerability, and new beginnings.

Personal Growth and Resilience: The puppy surviving represent resilience. It could symbolize your ability to recover quickly from a setback or a difficult situation, showing that even after a potentially harmful event, life goes on


& then the meaning of snake helping me find my lost car The Lost Car: Represents your personal drive, motivation, independence, or the direction you're heading in life; losing it suggests feeling directionless, losing control.  The Snake: A powerful symbol of transformation, healing, rebirth (shedding skin), hidden knowledge, often appearing when major changes are happening. The Help: The snake's assistance flips its usual "danger" connotation, showing that this transformation or instinct is a positive force guiding you out of confusion. 


So now I understood what Baba meant- when I say maybe I’m facing this pain; this illness in my life, because I hurt the puppy. & he says I didn’t hurt the puppy.


Baba showed me that Not Only has he Accepted my Shraddha, Saburi & Devotion, But He shall make me emerge from this karma Unscathed as he’s taken it over him, because i did Nothing wrong.

I didn’t bargain that Innocence of my heart as symbolic of a puppy & was Resilient inspite of being wronged by many due to their lack of understanding of this pain in my life.


So he shall Do Right by me for this innocence- “Dharmo Rakshate Rakshata”- this God has come to uplift Dharma!

& even an understanding of what the snake symbolises- as I prayed to him just yesterday,

that only you can move my life that’s been stagnant due to this pain & the snake in the dream- helping me find my jeep- was symbolically to end this phase of stagnancy from my life.


Hence he has not only moved the wheels of my life, But through this dream, Baba made me traverse on a spiritual plane, by cutting down that time of pain from my worldly life, which otherwise I would still be facing.


& I had no words to describe this feeling- That My Heart is Melting & Melting & Melting in him! As he answered my prayer with this mind blowing sign through a dream!!!


So I tell Swami since you’ve given me the sign- I shall share the yesterdays painting with the poem you gave me, But the dream experience, I’ll only share after you answer my prayer with the name of this illness.


Above is the Link to this post where I’ve written of his love as vast ocean that encompasses me.


& whilst this Post was getting uploaded on my insta page,

I couldn’t believe, the very first message on my feed is of Swami standing with Shesha Sai- open hood in the background with a message of Ocean and wave as the painting of Hope, where he inspired me to write- I’m the wave and he’s the ocean of compassion.


This screen shot shows that my post is still getting ready to be uploaded, while Swamis sign of Shesha Sai is seen.


So True, So Very True!!!


Once again I tell him- Baba this time I will not go first sharing all these personal things,

& then made to feel irrelevant like the last time.

Now you go first & do what needs to be done & Reveal the bigger picture, with the message you gave me last year.

9.10pm



Yes maa, Everything is Over Believe me- If Now your Role doesn’t start then there’s Nothing for me here.



7th December 2025

Since i couldn’t sleep so i thought- watch some devotee talk.. so i ask baba- “Where shall you lead me…” & from within he says - “Go inside your heart- Sit There!”

So be it. I’ll again hold on to him in my heart keeping that same yesterdays music on loop & just imagine sitting by his feet-

until i sleep Or until he wakes me up!

2.25am



Was awake till late hours due to pain, it was 5.10am, but Baba didn’t reach out, Yet again with the answer to this pain…..


Later by 8am,

I asked “Swami why didn’t you reach out…”,

was thinking…”was this whole dream episode of yesterday just my mind cooking things up”,

& he says from within- “No, Have Faith”,


later he says “Look up for the Significance of Shesha Sai statute in Parthi temple”,

So I again ask- “Baba why didn’t you reach out…”


& again from within He says- “My ways are different, Have Faith”,

& then goes to say “All you have to do is stay Available to me”.

- 8.19am.


As I look up, for Shesha Sai statute in the inner Bhajan Hall of Parthi, in it’s place there’s  this bronze statue of Sathya Sai Baba, That was re-installed in the inner bhajan hall (sanctum sanctorum of the Prasanthi Nilayam bhajan hall) in March 2020

Before this re-installation, the space contained a silver idol of Shirdi Sai Baba, often referred to by the user's phrase "silver shesha sai" due to its five-hooded serpent (shesha) canopy. This silver idol represented Shirdi Sai Baba sitting and teaching at Dwarkamayi. The five hoods symbolize the mastery over the five senses. 


So Swami was showing me that it was He only who came as Shesha Sai to help me in the dream. And as to why he didn’t answer today morning regarding my prayer…

As with this sign he was asking- “have I offered him these 5senses”, that’s the feeling I got after reading about Shesha Sai.


So I tell him, Baba I don’t know anything about my mind or five senses, this pain has washed me out so much through these years, that I only have this Heart- that’s Simple & Pure to offer you!

And I ask him in chits- do you accept it & he says yes.-

9.45am


That’s when I get an intuition- that maybe Baba didn’t answer, cause he wants me to paint this Bronze idol of him.

So I start doing this painting as his earlier words given to me this morning resonate- “My ways are different. Have Faith. All you have to be is stay Available to me”


While painting this bronze idol of Swami, there’s a surge of energy & then from within, Swami says


“This Paintig Shall be shared, My Child, with many, many countless beings- As An Healing for both Mind & Body!!! For Here in Lies The Heart Of Sai”

11.47pm


& I can almost feel that Child-like enthusiasm  in Swami like he’s just waiting for this painting to be done and shared!


While I’m listening to a talk on Swami & painting…



The talk I was listening to was life Changing Stories of Grace by Brother Bishu…


later once again, while the painting is on,

Baba says this from within my Heart- “Om Shree Sai Vishwaroopaye Namath!!!” It’s like My heart automatically, starts chanting this without any prior thought.

12.06pm


& what transpired next, at that very exact second, is something that even I didn’t expect,

& I had goose bumps all over & my eyes welled up in love at the sign that Baba was giving-

Cause at that very instance - Brother Bishu sings- “Vishwaroop Tum ho…Vishwaroop Tum ho…” meaning - You are Vishwaroop Baba.



My heart is on automated chanting mode of

“Om Shree Sai Vishwaroopaye Namah!!!”

While painting this Bronze idol of Swami.

I finish listening to the earlier talk and Baba  then leads me to listen to another talk.


Below is the link of that talk



And once again I truly don’t know how, But Baba had everything lined up for me, to make His Presence more evident.

Cause in the talk Brother Amey is sharing that “We only Need to take the First step & Swami will do the rest”, & then he goes to say- “What we need to do is to Be Available to Swami”


I was Totally Amazed & touched by Swamis love as that’s exactly what he told me this morning-

“You Only have to Be Available”.


Touched, Humbled with this entire flow of Divine Experience & play of His Love, I tell him-

Now if you truly want me to share the dream experience and today’s experience with all these paintings then you have to take the remaining steps and answer my prayer regarding this illness.


Later in the talk, Brother Amey explains so beautifully with a story of how it is God that makes the flute efficient enough & lends his music, simply by his Grace.

That It can be any flute but it is Gods touch alone, that can breathe music into it,


& that’s exactly what he’s done today for me, with all these signs of Divine-synchronicity!


Heart Of God painting.



By evening 4.52pm,  I offer this painting at Swamis feet.


I ask him what does he mean that “this painting will be An Healing for both Mind & Body!!! For Here in Lies The Heart Of Sai”


& to even explain  “When Sai Baba asks you to do something - There’s Always A Bigger Picture”

So please reveal the bigger picture maa.

9.29pm



8th December 2025

Swami didn’t reach out yet…Even this morning regarding my prayer for this pain. So I asked him, is there something lacking in the yesterday’s painting & he said ‘No’ in chits.


Later he draws my attention to today’s message which I had received post 12am

For me, Whatever message I receive be it on insta feeds or otherwise it has always synchronised with the current situations in my life, coming directly from Swami. So this message here…



“Let it all go. See what stays”…. may sound so simple, But since Swami drew my attention to it regarding why hasn’t he Answered my prayer yet..


I realised, When Everything goes, be it Mind, Body then All that Stays is Heart; “Heart Of God”.


When our identification with the body fades- that I’m a woman, or man, child or adult & so on.

& even our Minds & it’s Attachments, Desires fades then what remains is Heart & that Heart is Nothing But Gods Presence in Each-


So Swamis yesterdays message- “This Painting Shall be shared, My Child, with many, many countless beings- As An Healing for both Mind & Body!!! For Here in Lies The Heart Of Sai”


And while the painting was in process- He sang from my heart- “Om Shree Sai Vishwaroopaye Namah!!!”,

By these messages, he was showing, When all attachments fade, then All That Remains is His Presence within as this Heart & that is-

“His Vishwaroop within each!”


And even an understanding that when one can turn within to this Heart then it’s the Source for all healings be it of Mind Or Body.

So sharing of this Painting “Heart of God”, is Sharing of this Healing of one’s Mind & Body & the entire puzzle piece, simply fell into place.


And this is the Bigger Picture for Healing.

You know what’s the most beautiful part of this journey with Sai, is that “He still manages to Surprise you with His Signs”, Even though they are countless innumerable signs of His Silent workings.


Later Today morning I placed a chit at his Lotus Feet, stating that “Only If I’m your heart, then today itself you shall reach out to me with the Name- Diagnosis, Prognosis of this illness that for last 24yrs No one has been able to help me out with”

9.54am


“Baba only & only you can Finish what you’ve  started!!!”


& then I asked him- When will you make me share this Prasadam of your love Baba… & out of two options, tomorrow being 9th Or this Thursday. From within he says ‘Thursday’, & then he confirms it again in chit

11.02am



later I again resumed one of my earlier works of Coco.



While painting- I told Swami,

“You came to me as Coco, to be beside me in the toughest times of my life through this pain”, & countless times you saved my life, “literally speaking”, as Coco beside, When in this pain i felt i can’t go on & had even tried to end my life.


But as Coco you saved me & took a promise that no matter how testing this pain gets- in Cocos love I’ll keep going.

It’s been 3.5yrs since his passing, when you showed me in the dream- “Coco is seated upon your lap, While you’re lovingly petting him & saying- “Our Coco, Our Coco””


Mother, from this mother to you, I ask that please answer this question regarding my health as a Respect to Coco’s selfless love & givings, for the 13.5yrs of his life he selflessly stood by me. As Coco would even cry, seeing me in pain & rest his head upon my heart- in moments when i couldn’t even get up. Along with touching many lives as a therapy dog.

12.29pm


Once again he speaks from within my heart,

& I  note it down on the same paper where I’m doing cocos panting- “All of your works are A Prayer my child! & I Accept each & every of your work done till now, For it’s come from your heart & That Heart is My Presence!”

12.43pm



1.17pm

& later i tell baba, unable to control sobbing melting-

This morning I offered you my heart.

i really am Nothing & have Nothing to offer you- but this humble heart as this piece of paper at thy lotus feet! Maybe it’s just too less & way too simple, but that’s all i have to offer you maa. & i kept crying endlessly & melting in my heart in this love for him!!!


It’s like a dam broke & the tears as

“A cascading-ceaseless waterfall”, flowed from my heart, along with this strong feeling- “I too should have left with Coco & Be Home at thy lotus feet!”


I mean has there ever been An Instance, Where Swami may Not have reciprocated Our unsaid feelings….

For This is exactly how I felt- in the afternoon, when I just couldn’t stop sobbing, that I just want to go home now, to him.



Later, i asked him will you reach out in Respect to Cocos life his selfless givings & love & he answered - Yes!

4.54pm


Though…it’s 6.03pm already & the day is closing in & you haven’t reached out to me.


Now you have to go first & make way for me- Cause Baba No One Believes your girl & it’s not a good space to live from- where for last 24yrs of this pain i was constantly judged- questioned & doubted & cross-checked. So if you really want me to share all these works, then you make the way for me!!!


Above Link to the insta reel

The message here is “The distance between God and you is the distance between you and God”- As For me he is my heart- No Distance!









Above link to insta reel


Baba, i already took my step, & today I even asked you to make way for me- by going ahead of me! But For some reason you’re Silent again… As one more day ends in this Endless-Wait…



9th December 2025


“When Swami becomes Silent- Then you also become silent!!!” Lil voice within my heart says.






Above is the link to insta reel

I did this yesterday itself baba, i already did that.. But since you didn’t reach out & even Chose to remain Silent- So i too shall be silent!!!





Yesterday i cried inconsolably in the afternoon telling him- “i really have nothing to offer you other than this heart- cause I’m nothing!!! And here today, he’s Showing me He has Accepted my heart!

1.44am




I’m in too much pain- too much pain & really I’m dying maa..


Thank you, For all your today’s messages  & especially the message that you’ve accepted my heart is most touching,

But maa,

This time you take the fire, Cause since this pain came in my life- I’ve been Overruled!!! So you Finish what you’ve started. Only when it will come from you then it shall Be Believed!

1.50am



Finished this work today that i had started yesterday of Swamis love melting hearts,

like his love is like a fire, that doesn’t burn you…

But in-turn makes you Whole!


Swami with this all my offerings are done

5.40pm


Baba i have called out to you & You alone!

With all my heart! Countless times….


After, the Sai Krishna painting offering- i told him “I’ve done my part now you do Swami. Cause i truly have Nothing else to offer you other than this heart!”


And i left this prayer in the knowing-

“if it’s meant to be then it shall be!!!”

& his next message to me, is so true for i am calm. Even though I’m draining in pain & energy like crazy.



yes he does, he does…





10th December 2025

Once again was awake till late hours in extreme pain.


From my heart again this voice-

“With Every Second you Wait in Faith! Sai will meet you with His Grace!!!”

5.04am


& again this Voice says - “Something Big And Amazing is about to Happen!!!”

8.10am


this below was the first message on my insta feed & here Swami is seen for Christmas celebration 1996, meeting the students & enquiring how’s everyone & is anyone sick.

& then he goes on to give Vibhuti & says “Tonight Very Important!”




& i know Nothing with baba is just a passing message. I felt this message is for me- that “Tonight very important!” Regarding my health

11.02am




Baba you said “Tonight it’s important!”,

so you have to reach out tonight itself- will you…


to that he says from within- “My Child, i Never Disappoint My Devotees, & Especially I Never Disappoint those who have Faith!”

2.00pm



link to the insta reel






Above link to insta reel


Then Come maa, Then Come!!!




11th December 2025



Baba just yesterday afternoon you gave me these words- “My Child, i Never Disappoint My Devotees, & Especially I Never Disappoint those who have Faith!”

2.00am

Baba then pls come!


Was awake till late & then slept. But i told Swami in my heart- “I don’t know why you’ve not reached out maa!”,

inspite of yesterday’s message that “Tonight is very important”. I waited maa, i waited…


Later in the morning


I don’t know why haven’t you still reached out, my heart was pained! So i wrote to him this-

“Swami, I won’t be sharing “The Heart of God” painting & it’s experiences, Cause you didn’t reach out with the name of this illness & you didn’t Finish what you started- to take the First step in that retrospect!-

I Accept!!!”

9.36am


Post writing this to swami, i kept hearing this voice from within as though on a loop- “Baba Never leaves any Business-Unfinished”


Again that lil voice-


12.21pm

“Today your Mother will come…Today your Mother will come…Today your Mother will come…”

-Voice from my heart kept saying this…


So I write to him


4.41pm

Today itself my mother, you come…Today itself my mother you come!!! please don’t loose this momentum again with your Silence! Pls Come!!!




12th December 2025

Just felt like it shall Never Happen….


Was awake past 3am, & kept telling him-

“you say you never leave your devotee Disappointed”, But Baba days over days pass & you didn’t reach out to my prayers regarding this illness.

And it feels like I’m truly not suppose to share this “Heart of God” Painting cause you have to reach out & finish what you’ve started.


And then this early morning message & i felt just imagine “if he really comes, as he’s been telling me…”




if Swami walks in today, he will just meet with this heart that’s filled with His Love!




Link to the insta


This above message in an answer to my feeling that, “i guess this is how it ends!”

to that he’s reaching out and saying Trust, he’s making the way where there’s none!!!






Around late evening by 5pm, i tell Swami in my heart- “My entire life, in these last 24yrs in such pains, I didn’t earn anything- be it in my work or finances or relations…”

To that he says from within- “You Earned me!”,

So i say- “How can anyone earn you maa…”,

So he goes on to say- “You Earned My Grace & that’s one of the Biggest Strength that anyone can have!”



i asked him when does he want me to start including the messages for-“Heart of God”, from the earlier ptg or from 1st December experience

& he chose 1st.

6.03pm


Swami i Trust you, i don’t know the reason of this Wait, Where you choose not to answer.

But i know Nothing in the Universe can stop you from answering this simple question. & i know other than you None can make this way for me & truly finish this wait, So that it can be shared as Prasadam.

Cause not only it’s been a 24yr long wait-

but now i don’t know- What’s more left…

Other than “answering my prayers!!!”

11.25pm



& then the last message of the day.



13th December 2025

1st early morning message on my insta feed. Swami in Yellow & Yellow always makes me happy. As it’s the Colour of Coco & Colour of Sun. And that’s all I Need- Light & Love!


Countless & Innumerable Prayers of Our Hearts, Bhagwan must have heard & Answered,

Yet He Never Tires!!!


Imagine! Just yesterday evening, he told me from within- “You’ve Earned My Grace, that is your Biggest Strength!” And then today morning this message to re-confirm.




So true, He walks with us Every Step!






Both His & Cocos love was such that- I don’t know what they saw in me, “But They Never Once Gave up on me, Nor did they want me to Give up on Hope!”, Cause I would tell Swami, you’ve put your bet on a horse that Never wins- Considering my health downfall. But they Never Gave up on me & somewhere he even gave Atul as a Freind, who stood be through it all.






This message here, this letter from Bhagwan is so Potent here, as this entire work is about- Heart of God, that we are not this body, nor mind, But what we truly are is Existence, Knowledge & Bliss. It is the Heart that reaches the goal. Follow the heart. A Pure heart seeks beyond the intellect. it gets inspired.



Above link to insta page


And what better way to end this,

But to Be Whole in this Heart & Healed!

This Work is Finished here & it’s Swami himself who’s done all the work & it’s Swami who shall Share & it’s Swami who shall enjoy the love, Hope & Bliss therefrom!!!

Jai Sai Ram!!!

6.39pm



14th December 2025

I wake up to this Vision, Where I see Swami in Yellow robe & he’s holding a small baby in his embrace, close to his heart & every now & then gently patting on baby’s back.


There was a Calm Peace that came onto me, As yesterday’s day, I didn’t ask Swami for the name of this illness & didn’t feel the Need either. There was A Quiet Acceptance for the flow of life. And a Place of Trust- that He Knows Best for me


In fact yesterday late evening I even told him- Swami my life is Not that Relevant. Please share this Prasadam of your love with All, Irrespective of whether you answer my prayer Or not.

& by night I even asked him, do you wanna Share this work now & he replied ‘No’, in chits.


Later this morning





Above link to insta reel


He Gives a Poem to the morning Vision


8.19am

& there He comes holding me to his bosom. Where my heart & his merge into a seamless Breath of  Peace.


For…

I am the Silence that He Breathes!


I am The  Acceptance of His Every Will!


I am that Stilness in his Wait! Where all forlorn

In time get Saved!


I am The Christmas of His Joy!

& Music that Breathes Earths-soil!


I am the Quietness Where God sits by;

Where minds of tomorrow simply cease & die!


As this Child is born embraced in his love,

Whilst He pats my back holding me close!


For I’ve turned to him…

& I hold On to Him & Only him as my very own.

Now the world that once existed has Simply Dwindled in this space of white-

“Like An Ocean of Peace!” Thoughtless Beyond Mind!


For who can ever Separate the forest from the trees-

Hence None can ever Separate my heart from His!


For in this stillness- he actually holds himself-

“As That Child born from within each!”


Yes Everything has Dwindled Now in this

“Heart of God!”


For His Light is so Pure & White;

That comes upon Shimmers & Shines,

Yet it Casts No Shadows of The Mind!


And I knew in my heart, I’m suppose to paint this vision too.




Insta Link to the above message

Once again to my yesterdays heart-felt thoughts, that I don’t know what He sees in me, as both he & Coco never gave up & they didn’t let me Give up on Hope too.

& that  “He’s laid his bet on a derby-horse that none in this world wil counts on…”

So this above message is so apt.

As again he’s given me this Vision to paint-

Truly he only wants our Availability!



Yes! Only He does! Only He is The Eternal Sakha


I Offered this painting to him in the evening.

As by 6.30pm the work got finished & I felt such happiness doing this-

This is the Vision, he gave me this morning, He’s in a yellow robe, holding a baby close to his heart, gently patting the baby’s back. While the baby’s heart is close to him. Turned away from the world.


In a way, he was showing me that that baby is me,

But on a broader aspect- That Baby is actually Swami!


That once the Mind Dissolves- then one becomes the words in the poem-

I am the Silence that He Breathes!

I am The  Acceptance of His Every Will!

I am that Stilness in his Wait! Where all forlorn

In time get Saved!


So I guess this is what he meant by being Available! To Experience What it is  to Be-

“A Heart OF God!”, for the Mind has dwindled.






Above is the Link to insta reel


Once again His Signs, like in the Vision- When you experience his Love- then the World Disappears.


Later by 8.12pm- A Very Strong Vibhuti scent enveloped me in its sweetness & it stayed for a couple of minutes & then slowly faded. Swami was making his Presence felt even more evidently!


But what was to come, was something Truly incomprehensible. Just when you think- Baba has shown it all & given enough signs- He does something totally out of this world!


My mom had Wassap me a few pictures of Swamis 100th Bday- bhajan celebration at a devotees home- Arundhati Pradeep Gangoli,

in Dindoshi, Mumbai, that she had attended today evening.


I had missed her call & when I called back, she shared how beautiful they had decorated their home for 100th Bday celebration of 100 bhajans.

A huge poster of Swami, was placed as the backdrop, His chair, Ganesha Idol and then they had made a tiny room, in which they placed a baby- like a doll, with a snake hanging over on the ceiling,


To recreate- the Divine scene when Swami was born & a coiled snake was seen underneath, swaying him. With all the musical instruments that started playing at their own accord- to celebrate the Birth of God, back then on 23th November 1926.


Similar to how a snake had appeared, When Vasudeva was carrying baby Krishna across the swollen Yamuna in a basket on his head- the great serpent Sheshnaag spread his many hoods over baby Krishna to protect him from heavy rain & storm.




The above photo was taken by Mymom & for some reason it wasn’t that clear to see the snake,that they had placed above the baby.

So I asked my mom, will it be possible to ask them to send a close-up picture. And my mom replied that tomorrow she shall ask them.





(later in the evening of 15th, my mom shared these pictures, stating that the devotee themselves shared the pictures with all on Wassap hence she forwarded them to me.

So Swami even made sure to send me these pictures, Where the snake is clearly visible.)


& For Swami to give me this very sign of a baby, just after an hour of offering the above painting where he revealed that the baby in the painting is Swami himself and to explain what does The Heart of God feels like through the poem.


That this baby is the Heart within each & every devotee & is born- Only when one becomes empty of ones mind-

& As One Turns towards God- “Everything disappears & Only this Heart remains”


And even how a snake was seen coiled beneath Swami when he was a baby & the entire Significance of Shesha Sai- the five heads that symbolise- 5 senses & just like how lord Vishnu is seen reclining on Shehanaag; That Only when one has been able to overcome this mind- then like a baby- Swamis Presence is felt within ones heart.


As The quote “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven”comes from Jesus in the Bible.

And that Truly is His Vishwaroop within each- Where its no longer limited to celebrating the Advent of this Avatar- Sri Satya Sai,

But living each second from “This Heart Of God!”


I truly have No words what to say- But the length at which Swami goes to break even the most complex of teachings, with such simplicity- the way he plans each & every message & signs to visions & intuition for each of his Child is truly

“A Divine Ordnance”

& the messages embedded within our hearts through every experience & sharing of this Prasadam that he so freely gives with His Grace.


I know this Heart of God- Shall bring about An Healing that no medical science, No Doctors can give to countless & innumerable souls both on the plane of body & mind.

And draw one into an experience towards Ones Innate Divinity & Heart!


I know when God even utters the most simplest of words - within each & every word he has Already given the Healing he has promised, I just know!!!


“This Paintig Shall be shared, My Child, with many, many countless beings- As An Healing for both Mind & Body!!! For Here in Lies The Heart Of Sai”


Earlier by 9.45pm I asked Swami in chits- “Should we share this work tomorrow…” & he accepted the chit with answer- “Yes”.

So I told him, But you have to Bless this work, before Sharing.


15th December 2025





Swami, I’ve been awake for countless nights, due to this pain & to receive this message now- i humbly pray- “Please Talk to me…” even though you have been communicating constantly from within.

1.35am


Baba, Everything has dwindled! Everything has dwindled! Let Thy Will Prevail maa! Let Thy Will Prevail!

6.17am


Barely slept for a couple of hours, due to extreme pain & I’ve been awake since 5am. Waiting to hear Swamis voice.

6.21am


Later I asked Swami- If you say- “I’ve done Nothing wrong”,

then why there is such Unbearable pain maa!”

As yesterday night the nerve pain in my eyes was  unbearable & later once again, use of my left hand is almost nil due to this nerve trigger point.


As for more than 2 hours, Atul kept lightly stroking the trigger point area, near my shoulder & elbow to relieve it. As the pain has gotten so severe that I’m unable to move my hands, nor bend my fingers. & I have to keep my hand in one position as even a slight move- leaves me moaning.


Atul like Coco, has stood by me like a rock & on innumerable occasions has even cooked food, at times for months on end when I was bedridden- balancing both his work & cook, to help keep the house running.



After a while, Again i see him- as I’m listening to some talk & my are eyes shut- moaning in pain,

i see him- “Walking in an orange robe towards me- With both hands raised in blessings, saying- “I’m Coming, I’m Coming!””

6.52am.


Baba, you say- “I’m your Hope!”,

When you’re the Strength that kept me going.

You say my story shall Instil Confidence & Inspire;

When in Truth Thy Love is what Held All of my Fragile broken Pieces!

I wonder now- Now should we put an end to this query…(regarding the name of this illness)

Should we Share Thy Love through all these Beautiful Experiences,

& like a Child of Joy- I Wait for that Sign from thee; For Mother you made this insignificant life- “Relevant & Worthy!”


& if the world ever glances it’s eye upon me-

“Let it Borrow Thy eyes”,


For in thy eye Alone I’m Whole & Fulfilled!

For Beloved you’re The Hope that sang to me-

& taught me How to Wait for God…

For Even Waiting for God isn’t Bestowed upon all as frivolously; For this Wait for God only comes after lifetimes of pinning as “A Blessing!”


For Hope is the song that God put as Music within Souls who may be left Forlorn by this world; For the world knows naught how to carry this Vulnerability of God!


& Broken in bodies they walk upon their toes-

For their heels hurt way too much to touch the ground!

Hence they carry A Joy within their hearts- A spoonful of Sun to Sprinkle in life’s-dark & even if they’re Hurting- it seems like they are here to dance.

With every sprite in their step; they Reveal the Miracles of Unknown.

For God wove in their hearts - A Belief!

That they shall Never Fall into a place or crevice- Where Gods Grace cannot reach!


And with this Belief Alone, they light up His Sky- as Sun shines upon their Tears; which God borrows from them to Twinkle up as stars -

Every Single Night!


But Hope is Always Born from God- It may come to you upon 2feet Or like me- it came upon 4paws.

But Hope Always & Entirely comes From God!


O My Blessed Heart- he’s Kissed you- for lifetimes & especially these last 24yrs through pain,

“With This Kiss Of Hope!”

-Swami gave this poem


Baba I pray & Hope you let me share this Love sooner now!!!


Later in the night, Atul & I drove to Shivaji Park.

As I was very down in pain, So I told him, I won’t be walking, But since Swami had asked me to come to Dharmakshetra once during this work was ongoing, to get this work Blessed & I couldn’t travel till there,

So I’ll take this work to Shivaji parks- Ganesh temple & offer it there.

I’ve not shared this work even with Atul. As I’m waiting for Swami to Finish what he’s started. Only then I’ll share with all


After offering this work by placing the iPad at the Ganpati temple,

As we came out,  I asked Swami, “do you want to say something maa”, Now that I’ve offered this work to Ganpati Bappa


& the very first message again on my Instagram feed is -

Swami blessing with Both hands as the vision he gave today morning- where he says - “I’m Coming, I’m Coming” in an orange robe with both hands blessings!

I mean I still get so happy like a child with the way he reaches out. As I had earlier told him-

you need to Bless this work!







Link to insta reel


Only thing is, in the vision Swami was in an orange robe. And here it’s a black & white picture.



16th December 2025

Swami, if truly my heart is like a heart of a child- like A Heart Of God! Then I know mother- you will Answer my prayer regarding my illness- it’s name- diagnosis, prognosis as I had prayed.


For that shall be the completion & finishing of what you’ve started.

As this work- Heart of God, is for Healing of both- body & mind!

Now You’re just gonna drop this on my lap-


if truly i am that heart of God! That child…

10.53am



What more do i have left, to offer thee…

Other Than the Beauty of this heart- Which is None but Thy Presence as me!!!

12.51pm.




Just now, i asked him in chits- Baba will sharing of this work, without the answer to my illness be complete & he answered through the chits- “No, it will be Incomplete”


Mother,

this work can only be completed by you-

By your answer towards my prayer regarding my illness & Not just Answer, But Full & Complete Healing in both mine & Atuls health now!

So that the work shall end with the painting of Shesha Sai that you inspired me to paint at the very beginning of these experiences,


Which began from 30th November, When you inspired in me with this simple thought- that

“I should paint the photo of Swami sitting on Shesha Sai”, that came as the very 1st message upon my feed-

To be share along with the diagnosis of this pain that you were to reveal to me then.


Little did I know then these Beautiful experiences, Teachings & messages that were to follow- this simple thought to paint Swami sitting on Shesha Sai, would actually be A Prasadam of His Divine Grace, & to be showered not just upon me, But for countless souls- For this healing of mind & body, that would encapsulate the “Heart of God” within each!

8.19pm


Thank you For Everything!!!




Link to above insta


I’m gonna celebrate now maa…

Tomorrow after finishing the writing of “Heart of God”, with all the messages you’ve given until now-

I’ll Celebrate.




17th December 2025


Swami,

i just finished writing & going through all the messages & signs of this wonderful work- of your Grace upon us- “Heart of God!!!”


Tomorrow it’s Thursday & you had promised me in chits & even  from within my heart that you shall Answer my prayer on Thursday.

Though you had mentioned it last Thursday, But I have a strong feeling it’s gonna be tomorrow!!!

1.53pm


Later I offer this chit to him asking…


Do you Accept this Offering of Love- which is your Divine Grace upon us. Is it to your “Hearts-content”,  maa.  Tomorrow it’s Thursday- 18th, You Finish what you’ve started Swami”, by answering my prayer.


I then place this write up chit at his lotus feet in my temple.

And throw chits- Yes & No.


& the chit that lands in the temple, i take it as the answer coming from him-

This time for some reason- i take the picture of his answer even before I open the chit-

& he answers -‘No’.


So I wonder what now…


That’s when he tells me from within- “ include tomorrow’s chapter-  18th December with the Shesha Sai painting in this work” Even before it’s 18th….

To be continued forward as 18th December 2025



Later in the evening messages




18th Chapter 2025


Woke up just now, As i was trying to share this work on the site till 1am.


But just now upon waking- again a Vision- of Swami- with a beautiful hazzy colour like the orange of Dawn that has early morning streaks of pink-orange standing sideways- left profile, with both hands in blessing position touching my head, while I’m kneeling down facing him- right profile, i can only see my hair- tied like a plate,

& the entire scene is hazzy energy field, of Dawn colours

& Swami is saying this to me-


“To All the Beauty you’re about to Share- My Blessings are with you, My Child, My Blessings are with you”

6.50am


Contd from 17th So here I am adding the 18th chapter as Swami asked, a day prior to the date


This is below image shows that the painting was already finished on 1st December & offered then by 12.41pm, Which I’ve been waiting to share in this work….




& after i added this 18th December chapter already, a day prior to today’s date- 18th,


i again asked Swami- “do you accept this offering of love”,

& i throw the chits & one chit lands right near Swamis feet- with answer ‘Yes’





2.07pm


How very sweet of Our Swami- He’s saying that the “Belief Always comes first & then the miracle!!!”


Cause He Responds to our Belief! And I know tomorrow’s days is gonna be Spectacularly Divine in the History of my life!!!

2.33pm


PS: Swami I don’t know why the Shesha Sai is painted as 7heads here, I guess the Parthi image had 7heads so I painted in a similar way. I’m sure you shall explain this too.

Thank you!!!

2.37pm


just after the vision the very first message





Above link to the insta reel


What’s amazing is the song being sung- “Hey Satya Sai, Hey Shesha Sai, Hey Shubh dayi hare”




Above link to the insta


This is the exact shade of gown Swami was wearing in the Vision he gave me today morning. Pinkish-Orangish- the colour of Dawn that he had envelope me in- to show he’s ushering A New Dawn in my life!




Above link to the insta reel


For some reason i was struggling to upload images & text of this workk on my site. That’s when Swami says- check your insta & this is the 1st post of him walking towards us- Blessing!







Above link of the insta


Swami, since morning, I’m trying to upload & the site is simply crashing.


This is exactly the stuck energy I’ve lived in this pain for last 24yrs. Where every time the system crashes & i have to re-start from zero-  it just doesn’t feel right to do this work with this kind of energy…


I’ve decided henceforth in my life- No more pushing as I’ve been doing for so many years through this pain.


If it’s meant to be- then so be it…


Cause maa, you have to Bless & Finish this.

Now no more asking in chits- “When shall you Answer Baba…”


Now you’ll tell me “When shall we Share this”

6.21pm.



Baba, i fullly Accept what happened today as your Will- regarding not being able to upload the remaining chapters of this work



The above message just when you’re at your lowest, cause he didn’t reach out & then the words- that He himself may come…


Yet, I felt so crest-fallen…

There were these soft-warm-tears that weeped endlessly from the Silence of my heart- that Baba was to Answer today being Thursday, As even last Thursday he had promised, But didn’t…


Now you’ll reach out! 11.12pm


it’s a feeling of intense pain- That’s So Silent that it cuts right through the air & makes the world disappears.



Like you’re Not here for Anyone Or Anything else but him- Yet He Chooses to Not intervene, making this Silence as an offering of your love So Pure-


That shall get sullied in the echoes of words…


& makes you wonder- “Why am i even here breathing”,


When God every time acts to have Unheard- your deepest longing.


That’s the Silence that bleeds hearts of children’s for The Love of the One to whom they fully belong & without whom- they are invisible to this world, has himself made them Invisible in His Eyes…


Hence there is no place on earth, Where their tears born from pain- they can hide… As thy stream in an unending soft waters- so as to Not leave their imprints around Their eyes- For this pain too is Only to be Shared with the Beloved- In who’s longing these eyes have cried!!!

10.29am


(I could only express this pain on 19th December 2025, a day after, as yesterday the pain was so intense that i just felt what’s the point to living this way)



19th December 2025



Beloved- I’ve waited for Lifetimes Over Lifetimes; For Aeons Over Aeons to meet you this way; To Shower All of my Love & Swaddle you in my Grace! My Child even before a tear falls from thy eyes- This Sai baba rushes to Accept this Devotion of love flowing from thy heart;

In Silence that Only thy Baba can heed!


Beloved; Know this i still haven’t Finished Showing my love to thee & in turn Show the world- “How Beautiful Swamis Child is!”

Don’t cry henceforth- I Know Thy Pain- I Know Thy Wait & Know this my lil one-

“I myself shall come to turn your life into An Inspiration, So that others shall find The Courage to turn within & heed to their Hearts-call, Which is Nothing But my Voice- within”


& through thy Hearts-Childlikeness; Remind them- How Truly Simple is This Sai!

Just Let me Love you-

For i too have waited long to show you- How Truly you’ve made your Sai happy!


Till then don’t shed tears of pain- But Tears that Swami has held me in His Heart!!!


& See how your Sai shall make it transpire for thee & for many after to come, to help them Rise, Know & Realise-


“Reaching God is Simple”,

Give up on the Idea of what you think- “Your life ought to be!”,


Rather know- Sai holds your every breath upon His eyelids!!!

March Fearlessly in the knowledge That this Baba, Never Breaks any Promise!!!!


“Im coming, I’m Coming, I’m Coming!!!”


From your Baba

12.51am.


later 1.22amink of the insta










Above link on insta

Each time you go within- You turn to your heart;

You Turn to me & in Simply by turning to me- “You Turn A New Page in your life”

5.28am.

The very first post to open on my insta…

It was truly humbling to read why Swami was washing the boys hands…that’s when

my heart told him: “So Beautiful is this Love that is drawn towards the simplicity of Ones heart…”


maybe someday…

“my heart too shall be so Simple that he won’t be able to walk pass it- without reciprocating it’s Love!”

12.12pm


Later in the evening, As I was uploading the pictures & text of this work, due to the load of pictures- the site just kept freezing making the process very slow.

That’s when He drew my attention to an Experience he had Graced upon me, back in 2023, to be shared here.


That too was a very taxing time.

Where for months, I was struggling to use both my hands & the nerve trigger upon my scalp, had left me breathless, unable to speak, with energy draining such that I was struggling to do my most basic menial tasks.


Coco had passed on, a year & 2months ago.

& I was missing him so badly, as he wouldn’t leave my side, even for a second, during such flare up pain episodes.

Not only would he lay on the floor next to me,

by keeping his head upon my chest,

But sensing that tears would automatically trickle down my face in such intense pain, he too would cry, So as to tell me- “you don’t cry”


He had got so attuned to these flare ups, that he would even warn me, way ahead of such triggers, so that I would not get bedridden. As prior to Coco’s coming in our lives, the bedridden episodes would extend for months in a year, Which after Coco, these episodes-lessened,

But the intensity of pain had only got worse, & Nothing would help, Other than this love of Coco, that kept me going.


hence in that moment of extreme vulnerability,

I felt…I can go on anymore like this…

& the rivers of all my silent pain broke loose,

& I cried inconsolably….


That’s when Swami Graced upon me this Truth;

that- “I’m Not this body, Nor mind”!

It’s like he swallowed that part in me, which was Not Him & later what remained as “I Am”,

was this “Presence!” Of Him within.


& I came to realise that- That Presence is the Only Truth of each Being.

I could strongly sense Coco embracing me, in that moment of Swamis Grace & Love!

Such that I knew, Coco never left- For He too is the Same Presence.


In fact it is Swami, who came to me as Coco;

As that Presence of Calm Peace, Strength & Child-like joy to help me traverse these tiring  years of my life & to Open my Heart, Which had gone numb in this pain.


He inspired that I should paint this…

Even the way the painting got done- Swami showed me, He’s the doer-

As Cocos hands that are embracing me in the painting, take the shape like that of an “Om”

That everything has come from this Om & dissolves back in it.



Below is the link to this artwork & the poem that Swami gave me back then, where it’s even signed- “From Love”




Later,

these words flow from within; that lil voice


Each & every of our souls are Eternally Blessed by Bhagwan; We are All in this loving embrace of Love & He has Eternally kissed our souls- “By His Very Presence”


This Presence is the Source of Entire Cosmos;

this Hum of Om is Verily the Breath of God,

From which Each Heart is born!


When we waiver from this Simplicity of Gods Heart; We in turn bring upon our on downfall-

But this Kind God is here to Help us Rise;


& Rise we do- When again, we turn inwards to this Heart; that’s the Sole Refuge to take us back to Our

Eternal Abode!

7.52pm


This Heart Alone is the very Presence of God- Heed to His Voice within; For he speaks to each, As this Presence is Not separate from him;

Nay! This Presence, within each, is verily Him!

7.54pm


& yet once again it doesn’t end here…

While i was still trying to upload this work, after listening to a talk earlier,

Swami led me to this particular talk- & the entire talk is about Turning within, Being Aware of this Presence of God within.


Just as the Experience he had Graced me with in 2023.

& the most Beautiful part is the way Swami connected the dots- with an Explanation of Om, as I took this below screen shot of Bhagwan chanting Om, to how in the painting- Swami showed everything comes from Om; Which is verily the breath of God!

8.07pm




20th December 2025


Woke up by 5am,

once again have barely slept for 4hours.

Like yesterday morning, both Atul & I,

left for an early morning walk.


But Today we drove to Nariman Point,

So, Atul can physically train himself for mount Everest, that he’s supposedly to hike by early next year for work.


The uploading wasn’t entirely finished yesterday, So I had carried my iPad along to try & finish it.

While I told Swami in my heart- Baba you said yesterday you want to show your love for me- Then Show it today- “I wish to Experience that Love…”


Once Home, I was still finishing the uploading- that’s when around 1pm,

Swami from within my heart-

“Today Finish this work & by evening offer it & do Aarti”,

So I reply- “Yes Swami!”


Basically in the morning while walking,

I tell him, “it seems like this work is done”,

But I don’t know Swami- You are the writer & creator, So just like yesterdays experience,

I’m not sure if there’s still anything more needed to be shared with this,

As your ways are Unique & often catches one-

“Off-guard!”


Later, as I was still patiently trying to upload these few last chapters- Swami inspired me to write this


Entire experience of this work is truly One of a kind,


As that “Awareness of Presence”, within my heart of Swami has Not faded- nor wavered with time- What he gave is the Knowing that shall stay embedded within my soul, for Eternity

& this Knowing Alone has set me Free.


Forgiveness doesn’t come when we see where others have Failed; No God doesn’t keep accounts of ones mistakes-


Forgiveness stems from this Love- This Presence- This Heart of Swami, where He Only Sees- Himself in each! For the mind & body are mere shadows.


The reason why we bind ourselves in pain & hurt for lifetimes over lifetimes is because- We don’t approach & live life from this Presence.


Rather we live from our “collected identity” & stories of who we are, where we were born, parents, childhood, youth, marriage, challenges & so on- While The Presence of God within, Remains Silent- Untouched by all this Play!


We live from a place of Endless Desires that we think, Shall help Fulfil this Inner quest that’s innate within each heart to “Find Everlasting Happiness”


When in turn that Happiness truly stems from Oneness with God & An Experience of This Presence of God within-

As Swami would often say- “Happiness is Union with God!”

We live from this Space of “An Separate Identity” & Not as Presence- As God…

& hence we see everybody as “The Other”, unlike how Swami sees us.


Yet We can only Rise, Love, Heal, Forgive, Be, Dance, Sing & Paint from the Truth when we know- that the Presence of God is our very True Self!


& thats when we shall see everyone with the eyes of God- As Nothing is Truly Separate from Him!


To live from this “Presence”; Is to Live from

“A Heart Of God!” And therein lies-

“The Self-Confidence”- For that Self within each is God & that’s how Fearlessness & Unconditional Love is born!


The problem is we hold on to our “Collected-identities”, all along & then try to emulate God; When in Truth- “We are God!”


How Simple Yet Profound His Love & Teachings truly are, with these words He gave earlier-


“This Painting Shall be shared, My Child, with many, many countless beings- As An Healing for both Mind & Body!!! For Here in Lies The Heart Of Sai”

Yes - Here In- Within- Ones being-

“Lies The Heart Of God”


Words Fail at The Grace, My Beloved Showers upon me-

For he took away all of the shadows, That for lifetimes I’ve Collected as my identities.

With the Kiss Of His Light; where i cease,

Only to Realise- this ‘I’ was All Along- Him!

3.01pm


No sooner had I finished writing this,

I check my insta page & I couldn’t Believe what Swami showed….

The Very First Message to come upon my feed is-






Above the link to insta page to read this beautiful poem of Swami- which means- we are one-Inseparable!


& seeing this- I just burst out laughing; Like

A Small Child, in total Awe & Glee to the Love of this Sweet- Sweet Lord!


To elaborate the reason for this Child like enthusiasm as I had told him, earlier this morning- “I don’t know if this work is done”- as in finished now..As Swami can catch you off-Guard…


& with this sign- He indeed caught me by surprise!


To cut the long story short, Atul, who’s a Photojournalist by profession, While he was on his run, this morning at Nariman Point,

had shot some short video’s of simple day to day life & birds, that he wanted to share on his personal insta handle,


Later when he showed me the videos, he asked for a one liner to go with the reel.


& for some reason this quote came in my mind- “The Bird with you, The wings with me”-Swami


Since he liked the line & the meaning, he went along & shared that on his reel


Back home, I told Swami- “Show me your Love Swami”, as yesterday morning he told me, that he’s waited for lifetimes to show this love to me.


Hence him not answering my prayers regarding this illness is not a delay.

So I tell Bhagwan- “Show me your Love”, & even “when shall we Fly, Swami…” (while doing the arm action of flying)


To echo this current state- Where not only this site keeps freezing- slowing the entire - uploading process…


As well as this stagnancy of my life in this pain….

So I ask him- “When shall we truly Fly…”


So him answering that we have already embarked upon our flight with this above sign…

just made me laugh in joy at the Beauty this Beloved Lord spills within our beings!

Below is the screen shot of Atuls insta-reel

that he had posted earlier this morning with Swamis lin

What do you say to A Lord So Kind & Loving… Other than Thank you!


For Truly “he is the wind beneath my wings!!!”I’m here- Only due to His Sheer Grace- I know that & because of A Love that Heals & Reveals!

4.05pm.




21st December 2025


Baba,

yesterday afternoon you asked me to do this-


“Today Finish this work & by evening offer it & do Aarti”,


But not only the website froze, such that I couldn’t upload a thing-

But even both my hands were under a very severe nerve trigger pain & I couldn’t move my left hand & even the right hand eventually gave in


The uploading of this work has paused, once again

Of course it’s All Thy Will!

& you didn’t want me to give up, feeling sad & dejected, so you keep instilling this Hope- that tomorrow is the day- I shall reach out.


Hence to lessen that wallowing feeling under my breath- that “why Swami didn’t answer….”

I asked you- “Show me your love…”,


& even to that thought you reached out to me- with the sign- “The Bird with you, The Wings with me”,  & made me happy!


But I wish to tell you maa- “I Love You!” & that’s Enough for me! Even if you love me or not.


Below Swamis classic all time message…

There’s A Reason why He Waits…

There’s A Reason, When He says- “Yes”…

Yet delivers naught!


For that’s the “Conditioning of Ones Mind”- to mull, doubt, fight!


Whilst the Heart knows-

Gods Uncertainty is that Answer to your prayers; That in order to Receive…


One Needs to go pass these thoughts of

“What ought to be my life!”


To A Space of Complete-Dissolving;

“Whether he makes me Fall or Rise”- matters not!


As My LOVE for him;

Has Surpassed,

All the desires of my mind!

For he’s Become my All- More than any prayers Or queries that I longed for Him to Answer to & Oblige!

For in Loving him- I’ve found my home!

2.07pm


When Ones Love for God Supersedes all Desires, offered at His Lotus feet; Then He himself comes As A Blessing!!!

For God is bound to a devotee Only by Love!!! 5.20pm


While  the site is still freezing, & even to type one word it’s taking ages…


So as I was doing the work- Swami tells me from within- “chk your insta”


& while im checking the main page, something guides to click the search symbol from where another page opens & there Swami draws me to this particular video…


In the video- Swami is listening to this Beautiful song- “Humko tumse pyar kitna- Sai tumhe janate…” that Swami only you can know- the love we have for you…


I just couldn’t Believe, cause this was Swamis way of Acknowledging my feelings- That whether you love me Or not…I Shall Always Love you!




Above is the link to the insta post


& in the end Swami acknowledges, the students love by saying-  “now Bhagwan’s hunger has been satiated…”


So sweetly Swami Acknowledged my love too by inspiring me to see this


The last message…






link to the above insta post




 
 
 

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